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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Sitting In The Park

We've been having some moderate weather around here. By moderate, I mean it was 70 here yesterday. I'm not rubbing it in for you chillier folks. I'm just sayin'.

We took advantage of a warmer winter weekend to take EGB to the park. She'd been requesting that we let her out of her pen to explore the swing set phenomenon that other kids have been telling her about on the streets. After checking in with her probation officer, she was granted one hour of leave provided she was back in time for the afternoon nap. I didn't see that as much of a problem considering she can't run away as a result of her inability to walk. Also, Calvin is a mean watchdog so we could sic him on the inmate if need be. So off we went.

EGB is getting to the point where she is not so interested in her parents. We are no longer her world. She is now enthralled by the millions of neurons firing each second when she is exposed to external stimuli. By this I mean, her brain is like a sugar addict locked inside a candy factory frantically running around taking monster bites of candy bars, shoving Lemonheads in her ears, throwing sugar cubes, licking windows, and bathing in syrup.

Sounds like fun, huh? EVERYTHING is interesting, but only for a second..which means we need new things every second. This wears on the weary parental soul, but is funny to watch nonetheless. I'm speculating that this only gets intensified as the toddler years approach. But I will not be broken. I will bring thing after thing to EGB until she is thing-ed out. I cannot be out thing-ed. I'm the thing master. Thing-a-ling-a-lang. Thing. Thang. Thing. Thing infinity.

Now I'm no doctor, but what seems to happen to EGB throughout her thing-consumption process is that her brain neurons get hot. Really hot. And like electricity her brain gets so full of things that it trips the breaker that can only be reset by naps. It's the overwhelmed factor. EGB will just freeze up. Control-Alt-Delete. The sugar addict must sleep sometime.

Here's me in my prison jumpsuit contemplating nothing. I don't get the appeal of swinging in a bucket.
Upon further appears that we've dressed EGB somewhere in between Ralphie's pink bunny suit and Ralphie's brother's snowsuit from "A Christmas Story".
Ralphie's brother's snow suit....I can't move my arms.
Ralphie's bunny suit given to him by his Aunt or something like that....
Me, my parole officer, and the watchdog.
I'm prrrettty sure I've got a sizeable wedgie under this suit.
Jammin' in the park.

That was awesome Dad. Now I'm gonna smack you upside your head in joy.

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