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Friday, August 19, 2011

Happy Friday!

Get down with ya bad selves....summer is dwindling away.

Got a story or two to tell.  Until then don't pee in your bed.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Happy Friday!

Sometimes you just put something on, look in the mirror, and say,

"Damn, I'm lookin good!"

Peep me in my Harry Potter invisibility cloak.  When the doctor comes in with his needle I'm going to disappear and resurface in Hawaii. 

(Side note--On that hair.  Went to restaurant last night and waitress said, "Shoo! I'm glad I'm not the one that has to comb that hair!"  At the same time Dairy Queen and I both said, "Me too."  Hmm...therein lies the issue, huh?)

Check out my 6 pack

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Dancing in the Park

For those of you in the know--EGB gets her dance on.  Sometimes it's modern freak-out stuff until her sweaty mane condenses and sticks to her ears.  Other times it's a gentle expression of art--society reflected upon itself. 

EGB has been going to class to channel all of her styles into one mess of a performance.  She's been diligently going every Wednesday night for months, sweating it out in exchange for the venerable lollipop--The Dum Dum.  All her energy was placed into this mid-summer performance over the weekend at the Buffalo Bill Days Festival in downtown Golden.  For those not all up on dancing venues around the world, this is like the Super Bowl of dancing.  If you get to dance at Buffalo Bill Days you might as well bronze those dance shoes, hang em up, and retire.  You've hit the mountaintop--time to hit the beer truck and drink your Coors because it ain't getting better.

The days and nights leading up to this event were full of anxiety and preparation.  We put EGB on a strictly raw meat, deer blood, and ketchup diet to bring out her killer dancer instinct.  We had her practice her routine on the roof while blasting her with 3 garden hoses to build her unflappable stage presence.  There was no time for school, crafts, games--we wore diapers on our heads and danced  around a fire in the yard to tribal drumbeats.  It was game time.

On the way to the performance, EGB requested her window half-down and sucked her thumb in quiet reflection of the enormity of the moments to come.  Meanwhile, her captors, Papa D and Dairy Queen Barked the final instructions like a crew of bloodthirsty pageant parents.

"If your friends fall off the stage, don't stop dancing!" said Dairy Queen gnawing on a leftover raw elk rib from EGB's snack.

"Yeah, if a mountain lion interrupts your performance I want you to smile and whoop his ass!" I said drinking my deer blood smoothie.

"That's right you worked too hard to have some punk lion ruin it.  Whoop himmmmm!"

"Ha ha ha ha ha!  Whoop that tigerrrrr!"

EGB was calmly preparing herself in the face of her captors' craziness.  She's seen it before and will see it again.  She's a soldier prepared for the battles of the stage.

This video (go to the blog for you email subscribers) is the culmination of years of months work.  It's mind blowingly awesome.  I think all of our Apocalypse Now training really paid off.  The charisma, the charm, the's all there.

I think we're done dancing for now.  We're looking forward to gymnastics.  I'm guessing we'll need to invest in a trampoline, a 40 foot scaffold, and maybe some smoke machines.  Any suggestions? We don't go small.

"Oh You Beautiful Doll" is a nice song about me.

Peep these preparation photos.  EGB on the prowl.  All business.
 My homegirl.  We dance and fight boys together.
 The terrordome.....where it all went down.
 Got some flowers from the New York Times theater critic.  He's into my style.