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Friday, February 26, 2010

It's Friday Time

Yo yo it's the EGB coming at 'cha live on a Friday morning.  I'm about to head off to school to get smarter than you.

This weekend--I hope you get a bath, get your costumes on, and party like a bunch of Hawaiians in a Tiki hut.  I did last night.  It comes highly recommended.
Bubble bath time.  Break out the Dom Perignon and some candles.  I'm chillin'.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Return of Lady E-G.

We went to a puppet show last night at EGB's school. It was a relatively high level performance--by the puppets. Not EGB. I'm trying to erase some images from my head. Just think one-eyed coneheads. Weird, huh? I'll get back to you with a recap shortly.

But for now feast them eyes on this lil' star. For those in the know--it's fashion week in Golden. It's the time where all the stars=only one=EGB get their latest on for the world.

It's Lady E-G with more fashion than Lady Ga Ga has in her nasty toes.

Captured in the weekly segment, "The Stars Are Just Like Us."

Umm. Where's the grocery? Gotta get some pull-ups in here. These Costco diapers are for lil' fever dogs. I need the designer kind. Some gold studded ones wouldn't hurt.

Oh hey! I didn't see you Mr. Paparazzi. Get my good side. There's Sean Penn--I'm gonna go punch him in the mouth for you.
You want a close up? Ok. Photoshop my boogers please. Now get outta my face. I got work to do. Where is my butler? Daaaaaaaaad!

Friday, February 12, 2010

The Land In Between

EGB has hit a turning point. No longer a baby. Not quite an adult. She's pretty much a zoo monkey with diapers. A purgatory of sorts (without all the biblical fiery stuff). Am I baby? Or am I zoo animal? It's a tough place.

I told her to hold out until May when she's 2. It will all make sense then. That's what sucks about being a kid. Old people always tell you, "Wait until you're....." When I was 6 my sister told me to wait until I was 9 to find out about the tooth fairy. 3 years? That was forever. I hated being told to wait.

I lived my whole young life waiting for something. Then forgetting about it. Kids live in no-mans land. But the best thing is that kids binge and purge emotions. So the pining quickly fades. It forces patience because you're little and have no keys to get out of town. Locked into the world of your family. It's not such a bad thing, but you are pretty trapped at 27 lbs and 30 inches. The doors stay closed.

Then you get big and get your own keys. You are liberated from the confines of the familial bureaucratic administration to only find that you actually are a zoo animal--with or without diapers. And I'm not sure who's running the joint, but the cage is dirty and the bingeing continues. Now it's the purging that's most difficult.

I'm gonna squeeze the Friskies out of you.
EGB in the mountains with her Uncle Vladimir from the old country.
Girl, you gots to file the nails and do your hair proper. Flash a grin from time to time....they'll be putty in your hands.
My books and me. The only good thing about adults is that they explain what's in my books. Other than that, I really don't have much use for them.

Monday, February 8, 2010



If this doesn't make you smile and make your morning better, you need to drink more coffee and maybe spike it.

Don't open the oven and jump in it. It's hot in there. Monday is a passing glance....stay cool people.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Life Is

"Life is what happens when you're not paying attention."

Somebody said this. I'm sure others said it before him/her too. I've heard it a million times since. I have said it to others. But I just read it over 15 times and still have no idea what it means. "Life is what happens?" Huh? "...when you're not paying attention?" So then what happens when you are paying attention?

Like right now. I'm really paying attention. My hands are a little cold. My face itches. It's Friday and there are some options and some plans for the weekend. EGB and the DQ are asleep. The news is in my head. I'm staring at this screen really hard. This is life? Is it happening? Yes. It all is.

I will say this though. As long as we're here--life will happen. That's set. It's a resume. It's potentially quite mundane. Have you ever tried reading resumes? Our lives on paper are a series of lists of events and happenings. It's merely a flowchart. No matter how exciting the flowchart's still a flowchart.

But it's the meaningful life that makes it worth happening. We control meaning. It's our free will to assess life and attribute meaning to our resume. But most of us don't. It's a burden to do so. Therefore, most things just happen without any true attention paid to them. It's just chalked up as life and added on to our ever growing list.

This blog? Is it "life happening" or is it "true attention"? I'd like to think both. Why do we take pictures? So we won't forget. So that the moment won't get lost in our seemingly infinite web of lists. There is now a captured visual image outside of our heads to ensure that if we should ever want to attach a real meaning to the moment. We can.

The pendulum could swing. We could spend so much of our time capturing moments that there is never time to attribute any meaning to them. The obsession to attach value to it all is equally as ineffective, and potentially more maddening, than blindly building life's resume.

Maybe the quote should be, "Life is always happening. In fact, your life will have already happened. And that's ok. Don't always pay attention. It's overrated. But pay attention sometimes. It's worth it."

I don't think that's a quote that will told a million times, but I like it better.

The picture below an example of what I'm talking about. EGB and I doing what people do. Eat. However, it was the first time we've ever sat at a picnic table and shared a sandwich. Just me and her. Father and monkey. It seemed normal and natural. She took a bite. Then I took a bite. She requested chips and I provided.

But it wasn't until now when I looked at these pictures that I was able to transcend the actual moment and realize that true love is sharing a sandwich with a child. (For the record--I believe it helps if it is your own child or someone similar. I don't think you'll get the same emotions from sharing a sandwich with a random child. I may be wrong, but that's my initial thought.)

It was just the fluidity of the moment. The sandwich was passed back and forth. Two humans fulfilling a primal need. An occasional glance towards each other. Legs were dangling from the bench. Not much was said. It was one of the greatest moments of my life.

21 months ago I would have been eating that sandwich by myself.

Quit hogging that sandwich big boy!